Some couples choose to stay married but live separately instead of divorcing. While it works for some, it’s important to understand how it affects your money, legal rights, and future plans. In this guide, we'll cover the main considerations and top benefits of staying married but being separated.
What is long-term separation?
Long-term separation is when a couple decides to live apart but remain legally married. Unlike divorce, this arrangement allows spouses to stay married while leading separate lives. Some couples choose long-term separation for financial reasons, religious beliefs, or personal preferences - such as wanting to keep certain legal benefits that come with marriage.
A long-term separation can be informal or formalised with a separation agreement. This document sets out how finances, property, and responsibilities will be handled while living apart. However, it does not legally end the marriage, meaning both partners remain legally tied unless they choose to divorce later.
Some common types of long-term separation include:
Informal separation: A couple decides to live apart without legal documentation.
Legal separation: A formal arrangement, sometimes referred to as a judicial separation, where legal agreements are put in place regarding finances and responsibilities.
In-house separation: The couple remains under the same roof but leads separate lives.
What are the pros and cons of staying married but being legally separated?
Choosing legal separation instead of divorce can have advantages and drawbacks. Here’s what to consider before making a decision:
Benefits of legal separation
Financial benefits – Staying married can sometimes help retain tax perks, pension entitlements, or health insurance coverage.
Avoiding divorce costs – Divorce can be expensive, with legal fees and court costs, while separation is often a more affordable option.
Family stability – Some couples remain married for their children, believing it offers greater emotional and financial security.
Religious or moral reasons – If divorce goes against personal or religious beliefs, legal separation allows couples to live apart without ending the marriage.
Possibility of reconciliation – Long-term separation keeps the option open for getting back together without the need to remarry.
Drawbacks of legal separation
Ongoing legal and financial ties – Even if you’re living apart, you remain financially linked, which can create complications.
Uncertainty for future relationships – Staying legally married may make it harder to move on or remarry in the future.
Risk of future disputes – Circumstances change, and disagreements over finances or responsibilities may arise.
No legal finality – Unlike divorce, legal separation does not offer full legal closure, meaning financial claims can still be made unless a financial settlement is in place.
Pros ✅ | Cons ❌ |
|---|---|
You may be able to keep some financial benefits by staying married. | You remain financially and legally tied even while living apart. |
Separation is often a more affordable overall than divorce. | It can create uncertainty for future relationships. |
It leaves room for reconciliation. | It doesn't provide legal finality since financial claims can still be made unless a formal settlement is in place. |
👉 To help weigh up the pros and cons, head to our guide on the key differences between separation and divorce.
Financial considerations for long-term separation
Staying married while living separately can have a significant impact on your finances. Before deciding on a long-term separation, it is important to understand how it may affect your financial situation.
Tax benefits
Some married couples benefit from tax advantages, such as the Marriage Allowance, which allows one partner to transfer part of their tax-free personal allowance to the other. If you separate but remain legally married, you may still be eligible for certain tax breaks, which could help reduce your overall tax burden.
Pension entitlements
Remaining married could ensure that a spouse retains access to certain pension benefits. In some cases, pensions can be a key financial consideration, especially if one partner has a significantly larger retirement fund. If you later decide to divorce, pensions will usually be considered as part of the financial settlement.
Joint assets and debts
Even if you live apart, you may still be financially linked through joint bank accounts, property ownership, or shared debts. Any joint financial commitments, such as mortgages, loans, or credit cards, remain the responsibility of both partners unless they are legally separated through a financial agreement. If one spouse accrues debt, it could still affect the other, so it is essential to clarify financial responsibilities.
Spousal maintenance
In some cases, one spouse may still be required to provide financial support to the other, especially if there is a large income gap between them. While maintenance payments are often settled during divorce, long-term separation may still lead to financial obligations if one partner is financially dependent on the other.
Should you use a separation agreement for long-term separation?
If you and your spouse decide to separate but remain legally married, a separation agreement can help set clear expectations and prevent future disputes. This is a written document that outlines financial, property, and personal arrangements during separation. While it is not legally binding like a court order, courts may take it into account if both parties agreed to it voluntarily and received independent legal advice.
What can a separation agreement include?
Division of finances and assets – It can specify how bank accounts, savings, property, and other assets will be managed while you are separated.
Responsibility for joint debts – If you have shared debts such as loans, credit cards, or a mortgage, the agreement can establish who is responsible for repayments.
Spousal maintenance agreements – In cases where one partner is financially dependent on the other, the agreement can set out any financial support to be provided during the separation.
Main alternatives to long-term separation
Long-term separation isn’t the right choice for everyone. If you’re unsure about staying legally married while living apart, there are other options to consider. Each choice comes with different legal and emotional implications, so it’s important to understand what works best for your situation.
Trial separation
A trial separation allows couples to take time apart without making any legal or permanent decisions. This can help both partners gain clarity on their relationship, work through personal issues, and decide whether to reconcile or move toward divorce.
Trial separations are often informal, meaning no legal documents are required. However, setting clear expectations around finances, parenting, and communication can help avoid confusion.
If both partners agree to get back together, a trial separation can serve as a reset for the relationship. If not, it can make the transition to long-term separation or divorce smoother.
👉 For more information, head to our guide on trial separations.
Divorce
Divorce is the legal end of a marriage, allowing both partners to move on independently. Unlike separation, divorce provides legal finality, meaning neither spouse can make future financial claims against the other. Under no-fault divorce laws, couples no longer need to assign blame or wait a specific period before filing. However, divorce does involve legal fees and may require financial settlements.
👉 To learn more, get affordable advice from an experienced divorce lawyer to work out the best route for you.
Annulment
If your marriage was never legally valid or should not have taken place, you may be able to apply for an annulment. This option is less common than divorce but may be suitable if:
One partner was already married at the time.
The marriage was entered into under duress or without full consent.
The marriage did not meet legal requirements, such as being between close relatives.
Unlike divorce, annulment does not require you to have been married for a certain period before applying.
Counselling and mediation
For couples who are struggling but not ready to separate permanently, counselling or mediation can provide support. A relationship counsellor can help improve communication, while mediation is useful for working through disagreements - especially around finances or parenting. Some couples use these services to rebuild their relationship, while others use them to navigate separation more amicably.
FAQs
Is long-term separation legally recognised in the UK?
If you separate informally, there’s no legal recognition. However, you can apply for a judicial separation, which is legally recognised and formalises your separation without ending the marriage.
Will staying married but separated affect inheritance rights?
Yes. If you don’t update your will, your spouse may still inherit under intestacy laws, even if you’ve been separated for years. To prevent this, consider updating your will or seeking legal advice.
Are you automatically divorced after seven years?
No, divorce doesn't happen automatically, no matter how long you’ve been separated. Even after seven years or longer, you still need to apply for a divorce through the courts to legally end the marriage. You can learn more in our guide to automatic divorce after a long separation.
Final thoughts
Staying married but separated can provide financial, legal, and personal benefits, making it a viable option for some couples. However, it's important to carefully consider the implications and ensure that clear agreements are in place to protect both parties. Seeking legal advice can help you understand your rights and responsibilities in long-term separation.
Disclaimer: This article only provides general information and does not constitute professional advice. For any specific questions, consult a qualified legal professional.